114. Baby girl, the name is

whatever you want it to be.

I cleaned today. When I say I cleaned...its kind of the understatement of the year. I started with my room and ended up making the entire house spotless. I rearranged my room, threw out the old, replaced with the new, cleaned my shoes...I dont have as many pairs as I used to have..I'm liking that. Vaccuumed every room including the hardwood. Did the dishes, the laundry, dusted, took out the recycling...and the list goes on. My parents leave tomorrow for a trip and I suppose I wanted the place to look nice while they are away. The older I get the more habits I pick up from my parents. I wasnt one of those kids who would always say "I'll never be like them" because I knew it was an inevitable thing. We become like those who influence us the most. Character is environmental. Changed?..yes. Different..no.

My dad gave me these silly words after he found out what I had done:

"Where's my daughter and what have you done with her?...Thank you Ash."

I tend to keep a lot of weird things in weird places. I found a note from my coach that he had written me when I was 10 years old. I used to carry it in my softball bag to each tournament and read it at the beginning and end of each trip. It gave me a little motivation and also kept my feet on the ground. Knowing I started in one place and ended up in a completely different level of ball made me thankful for the path of it instead of forgetting that it was a process. I do believe it is a letter that I will keep forever. I also found things like my old phones, some books I hadn't picked up in a while, a bunch of cow toys that people had gotten me as gifts, letters and old presents from past relationships. Just crazy nostalgic things that had me thinking cleaning was not so bad after all. Out with the old, in with the new.

The more I know, the less I understand.
All the things I thought I knew, I'm learning them again.
-India Arie.


Have a beautiful end of the week everyone.


=]